I’m a Racist, a Hater of Women and a Bigoted Troll. But I didn’t vote Trump. Here’s Why.

I’m a bigot. I hate the left, I hate women. I hate the young, the old, the weak, the infirm, the unions, the Democrat party, the left in any western democracy. I have no time for the scientific method, common sense or decency.

But I didn’t vote Trump.

I bore people shitless spruiking for right wing demagogues such as Putin and Assad and I mercilessly troll the shit out of the one left wing site that I’m tolerated on. I get away with it because the piss weak liberals who run the place are too chickenshit to take on my cancerous output and call it for what it is.  Suckers!

I’m a self employed middle class businessman who makes my money conning those weak of spine and weaker of mind. I haven’t got a clue how the underclass and the working poor survive and have nothing but spite and sneering for them and those that try to help them.

But I didn’t vote Trump.

I never met a right wing conspiracy theory I didn’t like and I love telling people I’m post political, because that way I can be as right wing as possible and still stand a chance of getting laid.

I’m everything that people say Trump is; ignorant, fearful, bullying, derisory, clueless, and chock full of self grandeur. Hell, the greatest view in the world is the one I see in my mirror each morning.

But I didn’t vote Trump.

No, I didn’t vote Trump.

Here’s why.

Well, I’m not allowed to.

I’m not actually an American. I’m just a sad wee troll in a small town in the deep south of a shaky island in the South Pacific.

But even the deluded dream. And the self deluded dream the biggest dreams of all.

And I dream big dreams, huuuge dreams of a country where a bold, visionary leader takes the country by storm. We’ll have the bestest brown uniforms, the trains will run on time, women will know their place (mostly the kitchen or the birthing unit).

I have my political team working on it now. Both of them report good progress.

We are confident of our ultimate victory! We will build a glorious regime that will last a thousand years!

Workers of the world divide, you have nothing to gain but your chains!

Achtung, my lieblings!!! I hate you, but you must learn to love me. Love me I say!

Love me or I will keep filling the Standard with hate filled right wing blog posts from now until the next Reich.

First we take Mornington, then we take Berlin!

Nothing can stop us. Nothing.

And Nothing is what I offer you.

 

– Colonic Vaper.

 

 

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About tereoputake

Lefty, footballer, vegetarian View all posts by tereoputake

15 responses to “I’m a Racist, a Hater of Women and a Bigoted Troll. But I didn’t vote Trump. Here’s Why.

  • Civil war at The Standard | Your NZ

    […] Another related post: I’m a Racist, a Hater of Women and a Bigoted Troll. But I didn’t vote Trump. Here’s Why. […]

    Like

  • The Al1en

    Good satire is always funny as well as pointed and cutting. You nailed it, mate.
    Totally undeserving of censorshi, but that’s what you get with the three amoebos

    Like

  • voxmira

    It’s a bit wicked, but so true. I don’t quite understand why the subject of your post wasn’t banned weeks ago.

    Like

  • Lanthanide

    Since this is the first time I’ve been banned from The Standard in over 9 years of commenting, I don’t actually know how the ban system works.

    If I post a comment, do moderators get to rid it, or is it just gobbled up by the system?

    Like

    • Lanthanide

      Get to read it*

      Like

    • tereoputake

      Hi, Lanthanide, I’m really pissed off at your ban. That’s Bill just being protective of his pet troll.

      Once your name and IP address is added to the moderation list, all further comments go straight to trash. They stay there unless they are manually released. They do get read though, as the moderators regularly check to see that ‘normal’comments haven’t been accidentally dropped there. Plus, we generally look to see if banned people are commenting anyway. So if you want to send a reply of some sort, it will be seen. Though whether anything happens is a moot point.

      If you want to dispute the banning, you’re better off trying Lprent directly.

      Like

  • higherstandard

    What a pack of King Canutes !

    Like

  • locus

    ‘the troll’ is a considerate term for the manic stream of invective we’ve had to endure for the past few months

    harsh result, but on the button with the satire

    Like

  • Chris

    Have you had some kind of private run-in with CV some time in the past that may be driving what’s going on here? I can see the send-up aspect of things but surely you can’t really believe that CV saying he’s “not left” equates to having right-wing values, that his apparent support for Trump is really about a greater disdain for Clinton, that reference to Hitler “making Germany great” was true in relation to Germany’s economy before fascism took hold. And having a crack at his profession? Well, if I had my time again I’d certainly be inclined to be part of the helping profession instead of the shite dead-end path I ended up taking.

    CV’s nothing like what a lot of people on TS have been saying lately. Remember this? Look at all the support he had.

    https://thestandard.org.nz/tat-loo-viper-pilot/

    I can’t help thinking that there must be something more that’s causing all of this. CV’s not a bad person, so this is the only explanation I can see that could remotely help to make sense of it all.

    Like

  • Karen

    Hi TRP – just wanted you to know that I share your feelings about CV. He was banned for a week so I have been making the odd comment but he’s back now and I won’t be returning while he is allowed to spout his fascist claptrap there. I do not understand why he is tolerated at all on what used to be a leftwing blog. There are several who are fooled by his propaganda and that makes him very dangerous IMO.

    Like

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